A Brand New Life

Happy families are all alike; every unhappy family is unhappy in its own way. Leo Tolstoy

Despite my dislike of Tolstoy I very much agree with this statement. I have recently witnessed the endemic unhappiness of a family. I had been invited to the wedding of two friends of my boyfriend, which took place yesterday. During the dinner with elaborate dishes the divorced mother & father of the bride held equally elaborate speeches, albeit at othersides of the spectrum. The strained speech of the father of the bride was heartbreaking. It communicated so much more than what the string of words he uttered signify. It communicated his inadequacies as a parent. I felt sad. The mother of the bride's speech was full of zest and wit and an unhealthy dose of bitterness; in it she snubbed the father of the bride. Of course, not obviously. The slight was in the little things she did not say. She did not say she asked him for suggestions on the little film of her daugther's & son-in-law's life they (the in-laws & the bride's sister & brother-in-law & her) made. And to add insult to injury his name was not in the credits.
I spoke to the father of the bride (dating a nice woman, heavily philsophical about the status of his girlfriend); I found him a nice man. People are not perfect, though we often demand perfection in the execution of feelings & wording. We are dismayed when our expectations are not met and some of us repay the 'guilty' party with scorn. Of course, I do not know what happened between these two people, but to make the wedding of her daughter the stage of unresolved issues is not only tacky but also insulting & hurtful to her daughter.

The wedding was nice, very romantic. It is strange that the remote happiness of others always intensifies your own happiness. I fell in love with my boyfriend even more. I guess, that is what Tolstoy meant.